Having now done this before, 'this' being the resignation from a place of employment that was less than ideal despite current and personal economic conditions, I am... or I feel, resigned. I just watched a video Monster.com created to attract job applicants and was struck by what an employee said, as she said "this is the last job I'll have". Oh my.
It reinforced my determination to not settle for just any job with just any company. I've actually read articles touting the virtues of job-hoppers, and describing how 'they're more effective workers because they know what they want to achieve in a shorter time span', ehm... no. While my intentions may be honest, I understand the influence of perception, and in having a resume that lists a variety of jobs over the course of not-so-many-years, does not reflect well on my ability to commit to a job, under most circumstances. I've also held somewhat convoluted titles for a couple of jobs I've had, which were the unfortunate byproduct of having worked for tiny tiny companies where there were very few employees and subsequently, each of us was a 'head' of something. My then-employers were more than glad to atone for less-than-compelling compensation with vaulted and meaningless titles, even if I did take on all the responsibilities that title suggested. I am still a little sheepish having it down on paper.
After I got off the phone last night with a recruiter of a wonderful company that I truly truly admire, I felt perhaps, I'd stuck my foot in my mouth for the first time in a long time. I didn't take the high road when I was asked the ominous and awkward question of "Why did you leave your last company?" Despite the fact that I knew this question was coming, I felt this unnecessary and to an employer, unattractive need to be honest, and to be heard and understood. What came out of my mouth could be best described as verbal diarrhea. I can be a little harsh on myself, but I pride myself on speaking with finesse, tact, and THOUGHT. I did my thinking AFTER I got off the phone, and came up with my prepared answer AFTER I thought it through. Yes it would have been prepared, but not made up, and it would have been far more convincing. If given the chance to make a second first impression (sigh), I would have told the recruiter, "in all honesty, I was BORED." Ok I may have phrased it as "I felt restrained by my job requirements." No one questioned my work performance, or my execution of my expected job duties. They loved what I did. My sales rep knew me to be responsive and resourceful. I created my own projects, updated existing information, re-organized, networked, pitched sales, built presentations... and still found way too much time where I sat twirling my thumbs, waiting for my supervisor to provide me with any instruction or feedback. I am aware there are those who don't mind sitting around, playing Farmville and waiting for a paycheck. I find it terribly unproductive, uninspiring and a complete waste of time. At times like these, I would normally approach other departments to see if I could be of assistance, but communicating with other departments was banned, per company policy. As was Internet Use, MP3 Players, Cell-Phones... so there I sat in my isolated cubicle, thinking of ways to work for the company, by myself. I also don't exaggerate because the truth is usually sufficient. There also was never going to be vertical movement, it was a multi-million dollar business that was family-owned and managed by a handful of managers. Promote from within... to where?
So, here I am, a perfectly capable worker, looking for a perfectly capable employer. This self-imposed unemployment will be my attempt to find my last job... or at least get me somewhat closer to wherever I'm meant to end up.
Naturally, a blog post from me can't end on a somber or semi-serious note, so for levity, an observation: I think my father has it in his head that I have 3 options that will put HIS mind at ease. (1) Find a job (2) Go to grad school (3) Get proposed to.
"IS HE GOING TO ASK YOU OR WHAT!?"
"Err..."
"Do guys HAVE to be the ones to do the asking? In America?"
"Oh my god... why don't YOU propose to him?!"
"Hehehehehehe... just checking..."
#palmforehead
The end.
